Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Why My


Mother -in-Law


Loves to Visit With Me!




During my shoulder surgery rehab I was told by family and friends that I needed to tell this story. I wrote it a couple times but it got to be such a long story that I thought it might be too long. So I have edited, edited, added, edited and then decided.............Aahhhhhh hell with it!



So this would be a good place to stop for a minute, get up, get yourself a nice cup or glass of goodness, and get comfortable.


*******************


As you know The Hubs and I have only been married 3 years. In that 3 years I have only seen or interacted with my Mother-in-Law maybe 6 times. She and her husband live in Florida.



This long distance makes it kind of hard to establish a relationship when you don't see each other very often.


I think, she thinks I'm high strung, high maintenance, uptight, and my diet is horrible. I think she's annoyed I have rubbed all these terrific traits off on her beloved son.


Don't get me wrong I do get along with my Mother-in-Law we just don't know each other that well.

If she did know me, she would know that I'm lazy, unorganized, Queen of fakebusy; and, all I need is a nice cup of tea (or Diet Coke) and a sweet treat...and I'm good to go!



About 2 years ago when The Hubs and I were first married The Hubs had to go to Orlando for work.

Now me, Princess Lazy Ass, is always up for a trip with The Hubs if work is sending him. I don't care where he's going.




So I invited myself.............


The Hubs was there for almost a week so I flew out later in the week to meet him. That way we would have a long weekend and we were going to squeeze in a little sightseeing, Disney World, and some visiting with The In-Laws.

On Friday I would have most of the day to myself to go shopping and farting around while The Hubs was working. On Saturday morning we would meet his Mom and Step Dad at Disney World. I had never been to Disney World so I was excited beyond belief.



Thursday afternoon I arrive in Orlando. It's warm, humid and I'm lovin it.



I get to the hotel

HOT DAMN!

We are staying at the Peabody Hotel.


OH MY GOD!!!


I'm so excited. This is a lovely hotel and famous for the ducks parading from the elevators to the atrium fountain on a red carpet where they hang out in the fountain all day. They are also famous for a lovely afternoon tea in that atrium.


About an hour after arriving at the hotel and taking in all it's loveliness, my allergies kicked in full throttle like they always do when I get to Florida, Georgia or anywhere on that lower Atlantic Coast.


It's all the air conditioning. It makes my sinuses crazy.
So I take my prescription allergy pill.


Let's get the mini vacation started.............


Friday morning I get up with The Hubs, pop an allergy pill, and we head down to the cafe for breakfast together.


It was wonderful!


The best hash browns I have ever had in my life. I got the recipe from the cook and now it's how I make mine all the time and claim them as my own recipe.


Oh don't judge!

We go up to the room after breakfast. I bust out the maps, get my rental car squared away and lay out my list of places I wanted to go.


I'm feeling kind of fuzzy headed from my allergies but I don't care.........I'm going!


The Hubs kisses me good bye and says "I'll see you this afternoon." "When I get back we'll go out to Cocoa Beach and see if we can see the Space Shuttle launch.


GREAT!



After that.........I don't know what happened.

The Hubs came back to the hotel room about 11 am and I was in the exact same place I was when he left. Asleep in the middle of the bed with maps every where and rental car keys in hand.




I woke up and told The Hubs that something was seriously wrong with me. That I just didn't feel like myself.

I felt all weird and maybe he should check me in to the local mental hospital.



He told me to get up, get movin, get some air and I would feel better. Still having problems with my allergies I took another pill.



The Hubs goes back to work and I take off in the rental car for a while to do a little shopping.

I drove all over Orlando but ended up coming back to the hotel because I just couldn't get in the mood for shopping. I was feeling kind of disconnected. That's the only word I can think of to describe it.


It was so weird!


I come back to the hotel, had afternoon tea in the atrium and totally enjoyed myself while watching the ducks.



The Hubs comes back from work and says............let's drive over to Cocoa Beach and see if we can see the space shuttle launch tonight.


I start telling him that I'm feeling really weird and not myself. When we get home I'll need to be checked into the hospital.


He rolls his eyes and says "it's jet lag"


So we are off to Cocoa Beach


I say "How about I drive. Maybe that will help me stay focused and awake."


I start driving out to Cocoa Beach.

Well part way.

I was just too sleepy so before I dozed off The Hubs took over. I went to sleep in the car before we could even get to Cocoa Beach. The Shuttle got scrubbed so The Hubs turned around and drove us back.

I woke up in the hotel parking lot. Guess I didn't miss much.



Saturday morning we get up bright and early. We were being picked up by The In-Laws. Then we would go stay at Disney World.


Side note****We stayed at the Shades of Green Disney world Resort for military families.

I highly recommend it for military families reading.

It's clean, close to Disney World, and reasonably priced.


So while getting ready to meet the In-Laws, I take another allergy pill. I'm still feeling all weird and disconnected. I have zero energy to do anything. I keep telling The Hubs that there is something SERIOUSLY wrong with me and when we get home (if I live that long) I need to be checked into a hospital!


He laughs!


Long story short...............I never got to see Disney World, I never saw the Space Shuttle launch that could be seen from our hotel balcony window, I sat and visited with my In-Laws for about 1 hour in the 48 hours we stayed with them at Disney World.


I felt horrible! I couldn't stay awake, I was all sneeze, nose running, sinus headache and worst of all...........I felt like I wasn't really there, I couldn't hardly carry on a conversation, I felt so disconnected. Like I was losing my mind!



The morning came to go home. I took another allergy pill and I noticed that the prescription was almost gone. I said to The Hubs "Didn't I just get this filled before I left?"


The Hubs shrugs his shoulders "I don't know?"


That's odd


Oh well...................


Threw the prescription bottle in the bag and off we went to the airport.


I slept the whole flight home



Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh home sweet home


Business as usual


The next morning after arriving home I get up, open up the cabinet (not thinking I haven't unpacked yet) to take an allergy pill.


HOLY SHIT!


The prescription bottle is in the cabinet and it's full!


What in the hell was I taking while we were in Florida????


I run upstairs, tear through the suitcase looking for the prescription bottle that I had taken to Florida...............



OH NO!


Valium from the dentist!



Yes, folks it's true!


I had gotten the only two prescription bottles in the house mixed up. The pills looked almost exactly the same which wouldn't raise a red flag when taking them.


I had been taking Valium the entire time we were in Florida!



When The Hubs spoke with his mother and explained why I was so weird when we were there she said "Oooooooooh really?" " It was one of the nicest visits we have ever had."


Now every time we are going to visit with them she asks "Is Timi on allergy medication? We really had a nice visit last time."


I'm thinkin she loves me and looks forward to our visits.

Totally a true story!

I can't make this crap up!


14 comments:

Lisa Johnson said...

OMG! This is too funny! I can't believe it. Well, actually I can. Only you sweetie! BTW, I want that hash browns recipe if you will be so kind to share it.

XO,

Lisa

Unknown said...

I figure the best way to stay friendly and cordial with your inlaws is to see them as little as possible, it has worked for me for 27 years, lol
BTW I want that hash brown recipe! Thanks for a fun post, Sue

Linda Q said...

Oh crap Timi, I am just ROTFL at this one!! Thank God you didn't overdose yourself! I have always said I need to slip my MIL meds so I can deal with her. Well actually I have just called her doctor behind her back lately, trying to get her some help for her OCD that she has never been treated for.
So if she finds out I will probably be her "favorite" for sure! NOT! But I don't care. She bitches no matter what I do so I figure what the heck!
Goes to show meds can made a better world sometimes, LOL!
Or at least a sleepy vacation.
To bad you missed it all though.
Linda

Kindred Roses said...

OMG, you totally crack me up!!!!
It could only happen to you...
Cant wait to see you at the show
Julie

Anonymous said...

Hands down - this is THE funniest post EVER! I've about busted a rib laughing! You've got the best posts lately!!

Kal said...

I Love your honesty. You tell a great story! Too funny

kath said...

This is hilarious. I love a story that starts me smiling right at the beginning .... so, are you going to share YOUR hashbrown recipe?

Maison Douce said...

That is too funny, Timi!!! You truly have the weirdest stuff happen to you!! Love it!!
Isabel

SeaWorthy said...

CRACK ME UP SOOOO BADLY!!
~and baby I needed it..
LOVE YA!!!!
Lisa

Unknown said...

Lol. i kept thinking to myself, why did she keep taking this stuff. think deep down inside you really liked the way those pills made u feel huh? lol... mishelle

margie said...

this is frigging hysterical. hilarious as we like to say around here.

Wanda said...

And why am I not shocked? I swear we've got the same blood running through our veins! That sounds like something I might do.

Even more coincidence, my son and daughter in law have been married 3 years, but *they* live in Florida and I've been around DIL maybe 6 times. And she's always taking some kind of medicine to make her sleep! LOL

adozeneggs said...

Well at least you figured out what was wrong and there was no need for the mental hospital!

Ormolulu said...

Although I haven't met you outside of blogland, Timi, I feel like I know you! That is one of the funniest things I've read in a long time. Just glad you are okay, though (prescription meds can really mess you up)!

D.