Friday, January 30, 2009

All I Wanted
Was A Chandelier In The Dining Room!

Yes, one similar to this.
I found one I liked at Faded Elegance in Snohomish. My favorite dealer Mary had one that I like and was very similar to this. I needed to go buy it! She's having 30% off everything in her space and I needed to act fast before it was gone. Snooze ya lose right?
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I know The Hubs called yesterday morning and said "don't spend any money!" I heard him.
I know we are in an economic situation in this country.
I didn't care!
I'm a walking Dr. Phil and Oprah Show remember? I wanted a new chandelier for the dining room, it was on sale and well, that's that!
So here's the story...............
**Note** all pictures used in this post are not from the actual incident. Myself and all items involved in said incident were not available for photos.
I hopped in to my little car
(that looks like this)
and drove myself to Snohomish, parked across the street from Faded Elegance and ran in to buy my new lovely chandelier.
Came out, opened up the passenger side door, set the box with the chandelier in the seat, strapped it in the seat, shut the door.
Oh, you think you know where this story is going don't you?
You don't!
I walked around to the drivers side, opened it, got in, put the keys in the ignition, shut the door, turned to start the car and...
BOOM!
The next thing I knew I was covered in glass. Glass in my lap, glass in my hair, glass all over the inside of the car.
My car window did this
and looked just like this.
Only imagine this photo with me sitting in my blue bug, looking shocked, covered with glass, and freaking out.

So I sat there for a minute trying to decided what to do. I couldn't move I was covered in glass. I reached in to my purse to get my cell phone (what the hell did we do before cell phones???) and I can't get to my phone with out digging through glass. DAMN! Now I'm freaking out for real.
I call The Hubs. No answer. OF COURSE!
So I sit there for a minute and think. What should I do?
I have know idea what to do.
I call 911.
Here's how that went.

911 Operator: 911 What's your emergency?

Me: I have a non emergency (I have friends and relatives in the fire and police field. They told me this is what your suppose to do) I'm in downtown Snohomish and my car window just shattered on top of me. I'm in the car covered in glass

911 Operator: Are you hurt? Do you need an ambulance?

Me: No, I just don't know what to do. I'm sitting here covered in glass, can't move and I don't know what I should do.

911 Operator: Let me transfer you to the Fire Department.

ON HOLD..............

Snohomish Fire Dispatch: What's our emergency?

Me: I'm sitting in downtown Snohomish and my drivers side car window exploded. I'm sitting in my car covered in glass and I don't know what to do.

Fire Dispatch: Are you hurt?

Me: No, I just can't move because I have glass every where.

Fire Dispatch: What would you like me to do?

Me: I DON'T KNOW!!!!!!! I can't get out of my car, I'm covered in glass, if I move it shifts and I'm scared it going to cut me. There is still glass in the window so I can't open the door.

Fire Dispatch: I don't know what to tell you.

OK, now I'm really freaking out. If Fire Dispatch can't help me what the hell?

Me: I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO! AREN'T I SUPPOSE TO CALL YOU???

Fire Dispatch: I'll send an aid car. Where are you?

Me: Downtown Snohomish

Fire Dispatch: Where

Me: In front of Mexican Restaurant and across the street from Faded Elegance and Victorian Station.

Fire Dispatch: I need an address please.

Me: FUCK! I can't see any addresses. If I move all the glass starts falling and shifting

Now I'm pissed and freaking out. Snohomish isn't that big! Those Fire guys now every inch of that downtown area. They could have found me!

Fire Dispatch: Hold Please

Me: NO NO NO........Wait...................I see an address up the street.......here...........2222 1st street!

Having my glasses on would have been helpful in this situation. It was such a Jan Brady moment for me.

Fire Dispatch: OK, I'm sending an aid car.

We hang up...............I now have lost it!

My cell phone rings...............It's The Hubs

Me: I need you to come home right now! I was in Snohomish buying shit I wasn't suppose to and my car window exploded on me, I'm in the car, I can't move, I'm covered in glass, the fire department can't help me, the dog needs to go out, it flew in my chocolate milk shake I just bought, and I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do! I don't know what to do!

Keep in mind I'm crying, hyperventilating, making no sense and The Hubs is like.....WTF?

****A little Information about me****

I don't normally freak out in a crisis. In fact in our 3 years of marriage I don't think The Hubs has ever seen me freak out and lose it. I'm usually the person you want with you in a crisis. I keep it together, take charge, and handle things. I melt down afterwards when nobody is around.

The Hubs: Get out of the car

Me: I can't, there is glass every where and all over me. I'm scared to move.

The Hubs: It's safety glass, it won't hurt you bad. You should be able to move and get out. It's going to poke you a little but it won't cut you. Just get out of the car. I'm going to stay on the line with you while you get out of the car.

Me: If I move it's going to get glass all over the street

The Hubs: FUCK THE STREET! GET OUT OF THE CAR NOW!

Me: OK

So I slowly get out of the car and stand up.

The Hubs: Are you out?

Me: Yes

The Hubs: Are you OK? Your not hurt?

Me: Yes, I'm OK but I have glass down my pants and my shirt. I can't walk.

The Hubs: Stand there until the aid car gets there. They will help you.

Me: Sobbing OK

The Hubs: I'm going to head to my car now and come home. I will call the insurance and see what to do. You go with the EMT's and call me when your done.

Me: OK

So the Aid Car shows up and the two nicest EMT's come to help me. They walk up, look at the mess, look at me, see that I'm a mess and ask what happen. I tell them and the female EMT immediately grabs me and says "why don't you come with me to the back of the aid car and lets get you cleaned up while he cleans up the seat in your car" So we go back to the aid car, I get the glass out of my pants, out of the back of my shirt, my coat and my hair.
She asks if I'm ok, if I'm going to be ok and we start chatting about what happen. She tells me how that is the weirdest thing she has ever seen and they didn't know what to expect all the dispatch says is "Woman freaking out in downtown Snohomish with glass on her"

I'm thinking to myself...........ARE YOU FREAKIN KIDDING??? Now I feel like a some crazed psycho that was crying wolf. Great! No wonder they were looking at me all weird.

The Snohomish Fire Department was very very very nice. They helped, they cleaned the glass out of my car seat, took the rest of the glass out of the door, they got me calmed down, and got me so I could at least sit in my car while I waited for someone to come get me or call a tow truck.

Thank you Snohomish Fire Department.

I totally appreciate you helping me and I will vote yes on anything you want! I'll even come to your pancake feed and pay double!

Thank you!

To The Fire Dispatch Operator...............GO TO HELL! Why didn't you tell me that the glass was safety glass and I would be fine!

Now I'm sitting in my car and I call The Hubs. He says he's on his way, he has called the insurance and we need to call AAA and have my car towed to the glass place that is in Everett.

Now I have gone from scared, freaked out, and crying to just pissed off!

I said "HELL NO!" "Feakin Volkswagen is paying for this!"

So I get on the phone with the dealership. They were very nice and said "of course we will replace that" "that is so weird". We will also have your car towed. Where are you?

Thank you Pignataro Volkswagen. You will continue to get my business and I will let everyone know you did right by me with no questions asked.

An hour later a tow truck is there to pick me up courtesy of Volkswagen.

My new Align CenterBFF, knight in shinny armor, Rich from Hansen Towing was super nice and humored me on the long ride to the dealership. Probably so I wouldn't cry.

We played Tow Truck Driver Confessions (this really should be a show!) and he told me stories of the dumbest and most F'd up stuff he's seen in his 24 years of driving tow truck. It was very entertaining.

He also mentioned that The Hubs deserved a metal being married to me.

Yeah whatever Rich!

How could he know this after only 2o minutes in the truck with me???

ANYWAY.....................

The Hubs met me at the dealership, unloaded the chandelier from my car, threw my milk shake away (I had just gotten it at Jack in The Box before this all happened and it was going to be damn good! What a waste of a good milk shake)gave me a hug and said........"lets go home"

Damn I love him!

I started leaving Snohomish at 1:30 in the afternoon. I got home at 6:30.

All I wanted................was a new chandelier for the dining room!

Apparently this was the Shit Shopping Gods laying down some bad ass karma on me.

This is just another case of...........I can't make this shit up!

Monday, January 26, 2009



****Caution****
This posting isn’t for the fainthearted, easily offended, male audience, children or my parents!


The Hubs is a retired sailor and has pretty much seen a lot of things I can’t even begin to understand. One of those things being The Lady’s of Thailand and the famous Ping Pong Show. It has perplexed me for years (even before I met The Hubs) as to how those women discovered they had such a talent. Were they just sitting around and someone said “hey look what I just discovered I can do!” as they are shooting a ping pong ball out their Vajayjay. I just never could wrap my brain around how someone could discover such a talent. I know that there is a lot more to this “talent” selection process than I really want to know but you get where I’m going with this not understanding right? How does a girl discover she should really apply for the new Ping Pong Idol contest and become part of the “arts” in Thailand? I just have never understood it.


I had my annual doctor’s appointment the other day. I was soooooooooooo not looking forward to going and had put it off as long as I could.
I got up, got showered, shaved, lotioned up so I smelled good, clean underwear, clean bra, Ladies, you know the routine. I even fasted for 12 hours prior for this appointment.

So I get to my appointment, check in with the nurse, she tells me “good news /bad news, you haven’t shrunk but you have gained weight” FANTASTIC! I was hoping for tall and skinny. Maybe next time!
Then we go in to the exam room where she takes my vitals, takes some blood and proceeds to ask me why I don’t have kids. I’m thinking “you have my damn chart!” "You know why!"
We chat for a little while, then I wait for the doctor.
My doctor is a female, she’s a few years younger than me and we always have a good time when I have a visit. We joke around, she listens to me bitch about how I’m falling apart, I’m hormonal, and I’m probably going to need some kind of surgery on my latest Hypochondriac aliment I have dreamed up. She usually ends the appointment with “you’re not falling apart, you’re super healthy, you don’t need surgery and I’ll see you next year”
So she comes in, we chat, start laughing and joking around like we usually do. She proceeds with the exam and then it’s time….. DUM DUM Insert doom music here…… Time for the dreaded “get to know you “ part of the exam. So I slide down, legs pointed to Jesus, and we start chatting as she's getting to know me better. Then she cracks some joke, I crack a joke back and I start laughing. HUGE MISTAKE! As soon as I started laughing the speculum flew out across the room. Now my doctor is laughing so hard she can’t even speak. I say “ did that just shoot out of me?” She barely gets out the reply of yes and I say “DAMN! I should go to Thailand and work!” “I had no idea!” All she can manage to get out is “stop talking and laughing!” So she finishes up the exam and basically calls it quits for my appointment because she can't stop laughing.
As I was getting my paperwork together from the nurse, my doctor comes out and says to me “I have done probably 10,000 of these exams and I have NEVER had that happen!”
I laughed and told her that I had always wondered how those ping pong show ladies knew they could do that and now I know. AND….. WOWZA was my
ex-sailor husband going to be happy with this news!


I think he’s been searching the sporting goods ads for ping pong ball sales since I told him!

If I mysteriously stop blogging for a couple weeks without notifying you………..CALL THE AUTHORITIES! He got me a job…..IN THAILAND!!!

I can’t make this shit up!

Sunday, January 25, 2009

I Try, Lord I Really Do Try!



I talked The Hubs in to moving to the burbs of the big city from his rural country house. I buy him Faconnable shirts and Aruba Zip Sweatshirt by Tommy Bahama. I try to show him nice restaurants, fine wines, and that using a cloth napkin every once in a while is a nice change. That trucks aren't just for muddin but can haul fine rare antiques too.
OK, some of that is crap but you get my point.
Then I went to town and left him alone........................
When I got home this is what I found!
The Hubs/ The Contractor had taken upon himself to fix his pants all by himself while working on the bathroom floor.


I guess that just shows that ya can't never change a redneck!
Good Lord! I try, yes I do try.
Yes, that's duct tape he used to fix his pants!
Oh well.........that's one of the many reasons why I married him!
The conversation......
The Hubs: Hey I fixed my pants
Me: Nice!
Me: Hey can I take a picture of that and blog about it?
The Hubs: Sure, I guess.
Me: OK, let me get my picture taken device Pa!
The Hubs: Does the duct tape make my thighs look fat?
Me: Oh no Honey, you look great!
On to other things...................
Here is an update on our quick, we can do this in a weekend bathroom redo that started a month ago.

The Hubs/The Contractor got the tile all down this weekend. It's all stuck and everything. Stuck as in not going anywhere, permanent, not ever moving.

Now he's working on the edges. He had to cut all those little black tiles in half so he could fill in by the door and around the tub.
See all these little pieces????

As I was sitting here writing this blog I could hear The Hubs up stairs in the bathroom cussing, wanting to know where all his cut tiles went to.

Then I heard.............God Damn it Franklin!

Timi come get the cat! He keeps takin the tiles!

It's lookin good.

The Hubs has done a great job for never doing this kind of work before.

We are so excited that it's coming along so well.

In closing.................

Yeah it's the white crap again!

We woke up this morning (Sunday) to more snow!

It's been snowing all day. The weather man says we are suppose to get more this week. What a great way to start the week!

Can you sense the sarcasm?

Thank you everyone for your advice to my "where do you draw the line " question. I really appreciate all your input.

The blog in question will be posted tomorrow.

Remember............No Judging!

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Blogger Advice Needed
Happy Saturday friends and fellow bloggers!
Here is my question today...............
What is too personal to blog about?
Where do you draw the line?
What if it's so funny you want to tell people but it will expose very personal details of your life?
What if your so angry about it that you want to vent but it will expose probably more details than necessary about your personal life?
Do you do it?
Where is your line with what you blog about?

Thursday, January 22, 2009

OOOOOOOOOH I’m Back!

I know!

It’s been what seems like forever since I did a post. It’s not because I’m so busy it’s more like because nothing really exciting has been happening at


The House of B’s.

Over the last week I have been doing lot of screwing around with Laura, Michele, and Donna. We have done some thrift store shopping, dollar store shopping, mall shopping, had afternoon tea at The Queen Mary, football party, and some more shopping.






Tuesday I took my mom and Princess Spoiled Brat to the airport for an unexpected trip to Florida. My uncle passed away this last weekend and they are going out to attend the services and be with my aunt.


I'm so happy they were able to do that.


6 year old Princess Spoiled Brat was so funny when I took them to the airport. She was all dressed up in a little skirt, tights, boots, dress coat, leopard print hat, gloves, and scarf. Then she had her grown up luggage that I had bought her for Christmas. No more Princess luggage for her. She is all about monograms on stuff now.


Yes, that is my doing!
I wish I would have taken my camera. She was trying to be so grown up, and acting like traveling was something she did everyday. Reading signs for where to go, pulling her luggage her self, and making sure all her prized possessions (15 thousand My Favorite Ponies) were packed safely before they took her luggage to be loaded.


I love that my mother has gotten her bitten by the travel bug early. She loves to go anywhere! I hope when she grows up she does get to travel as much as she wants!




I also went to dinner Tuesday night with my Non-Book Club friends (we use to all read the same books, now we are just friends that love to get together and visit over drinks and dinner) at Purple Café in Woodinville. I collected a couple belated birthday presents while at dinner.


It was like Timi Week started all over again.


Look what I got from Laura


This very cute Vera Bradley Hipster New Colors bag and Vera Bradley Botanica Reversible Belt. I'll be stylin for Farm Chicks!



I got this very cute and very appropriate gift from Shawn. How fabulous is this?Archipelago Monograms Soy Candle B - Bougainvillea & Tuberose

Yesterday I did a little thrift store shopping while I was suppose to be running errands.
I was so thrilled with all my finds. The Hubs has started calling my thrift store shopping Shit Shopping.


I felt like I had a very successful day if shit shopping.
Look at my finds…………….



Remember the cute little vintage handbag keeper I found a couple weeks ago? I found this great hat box that goes with it.


The colors are perfect together. The colors don't match a thing I have but they are so fabulous I had to have them. I put all my handbags and hats in them up in the top of my closet.


I love it!

Makes me feel all organized and shit!

I was so happy to come across this find. How fantabulous is this going to look in my new bathroom if it ever gets finished? I'm thinking I need to paint it black. My thought is, if I keep packing shit home for the "new " bathroom eventually The Hubs will get the hint that it needs to get done!

How dang cute is this?

I walked in to one of the little grandma operated thrift stores that is only open every 3rd Tuesday of the month with a full moon when the month ends in R.

Well I happen to hit it on the right day and this was sitting right inside the door. I walked in, picked it up and said "I'll take it!"



I have no plan for this little side table but it was just too cute to pass up.

I'm a big fabric, notions, trims, buttons and linens hoarder. I sometimes buy the oddest things just because I like the fabric or the buttons.

I found these cute cotton curtain panels. I think the fabric is so cute. Then I came across all these trims.

I'll add all this to my collection.


I saw in one of my magazines that they had taken old Ball Jars and planted paper whites in them. It was so cute. I was thinking maybe these would be cute with some hyacinthsin in them for spring.
We will see, I'm usually not so good with the follow through on planting things.


Now the find of the day that I was just giddy over.............
This cotton print blanket in all the colors of my bedroom.

I think it's going to look fabulous in there! When I get it all washed up and figure out where I'm going to put it I'll take pictures and show you have fabulous it is.

Here is a hard to find item I was excited about. It's hard to find nut crackers and picks in these parts. We use them for crab crackers and everyone is looking for them. I found these at the grandma thrift store. I'll be passing these on to Laura, she was looking for some and couldn't find them. I got a couple last week.

I stopped at a store to do a return and I just happen to get there when they were putting out some new Life is good Longsleeve Shirt for Women. I'm a huge fan of this line of clothes and everything it stands for.
I had to have this shirt!



When I got home and there was huge box on my front porch.
??????
I did'nt order anything.


So I open up the box.....


Look what was in side!
I was so excited I about wet my pants.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS!



I know your probably wondering the same thing The Hubs was………
What the hell is it?


It’s a Wired Haired Fox Terrier topiary form!
Donna had it sent to me for my birthday.
It’s freakin fantastic and I’m so excited to find a place for it, get it planted and looking fantastic.
Any suggestions?
Where should I put it?
What should I plant it with?
Should I let it stand alone or should I put it in a large pot with other flowers?
This form came from Plant Play.

Check out these Topiary Airedale forms. I thought they were very cool also.
Here are some other projects I have been working............
I have always wanted to be a good sewer. I know the proper word to use would be seamstress. Not with me I just want to sew well. I love fabric, I hoard it and I need to do something with all of it. So I decided I was going to get out my sewing machine and start sewing.
I figure it's like anything if you keep practicing you will get better.
I started with this apron pattern. I figured it would be easy enough. It wasn't bad.


I have the worst time following instructions on patterns. I think this is what keeps me from trying.

I also thought my hutch needed a little spiffin up.

This is before


This is after

I was trying to use some of the items given to The Hubs and I by our Grandmothers.

Now I'm kind of thinking it just looks like a cluttered mess. This is something I'm going to have to work on again. I'm not sold on my display skills.


The Hubs went out the other day and started the chain saw up and started trying to clean up the aftermath of snow, wind and flooding.

This was a huge old growth Lilac tree in our front yard. It just broke right in half. That one made me sad. The rest of the trees and scrubs that got broke off I don't really care. They will come back. This Lilac tree I'm a little sad to see cut down. Maybe it will come out of it this spring.


Charlie and I watched a little of the clean up. Yes, I should have been out there helping.
I cleaned bathrooms (yes there is still 2 that needed cleaning) while he was out there. I hate yard work!

Have a wonderful day!

Friday, January 16, 2009

Snow Days Project

As most of you know during the snow The Hubs and I started a huge bathroom updating project.
The huge part of the job being.........we don't know what in the hell we are doing!
Well it's been a little slow going, The Hubs is doing a great job but it's still not done. Which frustrates the hell out of me. It only takes an hour or sometimes a half hour on TV! I don't know what the hold up is????
During the snow days, while he was in the bathroom with his head stuck in the floor cussing up a storm like a truck drivin sailor, I decided I would tear something else apart. Make another mess.


I have wanted to recover the seats on my dining room chairs since I got them but I just couldn't find the right fabric. One day this last summer I was in Wal-Mart and they had this green toile that I liked. So for no reason, with no plan for it, just because I liked it, I bought 5 yards. Well, I came across it while looking for something else in my junk room and a light bulb went on. How about I put that on my dining room chairs?


These were my dining room chairs before



They were covered in a nice silk and I liked them but didn't love them. The silk was starting to tear and fray so it was time to do something else.

Not to mention they just didn't go very well with the colors I have going on now in my dining room and living room right now.

So with the help of my handy dandy floral screwdriver and air powered staple gun.........
DUM DUM DUM.........Drum Roll Please......................

After



This is upholstery fabric from Wal-Mart and it was very inexpensive. I think it was about $10 for the 5 yards of fabric.

Not too bad. Now when I want to change them out again I won't feel bad about ripping this off and putting something else on.

I was so inspired with the change, I changed the table cloth , runner and crap for the table center piece. Now I need to find something else to go in the covered stands and around them.
**Note the chandelier hanging in the dining room, it will come up later in conversation.

Any suggestions?

I also need to do something with my china hutch shelves.

Uuuuuuhmmmmmm?????
I'll have to think about that.
I'm open to suggestions.

Here's a bathroom redo update
just in case you were wondering....



The walls are painted, the wainscoting is painted



The lights are up. HOWEVER, I don't like these lights. I'm thinking of taking the chandelier out of the dining room and putting it in the bathroom and getting a new one for the dining room.

I found a chandelier I really like from one of my favorite antique dealers in Snohomish. I just need to come up with some cash and give her a call. Hopefully it will still be there when I'm ready to buy.
My last name really should be Shouldaboughtit. I say that a lot!



The Hubs has been slowly cutting tiles and getting them ready to install. It's been kind of slow. With him going back to his real job (not his fake contractor job) he really isn't all excited to work on it when he gets home.
I'm going to have to start crackin the whip around here I guess.

I think it will look great.

I'm excited to get it done.


Have a great weekend!