How Was The Beach Part Deux!

I need to finish telling you about our trip to the beach so I can move on to some more exciting stories. I have been busy the last couple days!

Sooooooooooo on Saturday day 2 at the beach............

The Hubs and I got up and got movin' to garage sales fairly early again. I can't press my luck with the O'Dark:30 time schedule too many times. The Hubs gets a little cranky.

There were a couple sales I spotted on Friday that were starting today so we needed to get movin! First stop Cottage Bakery for coffee and a sweet treat. If they don't have what you want here...........you don't need it! I was very happy with my little selection of .........1 of everything! The Hubs had a Buttermilk Bar and a cream cheese-filled croissant that made him very happy with his big cup of coffee. Important to keep The Hubs happy other wise he's not a good shopper. Side note for visiting the Cottage Bakery , if you are lucky enough (as we were) a mother will come in with two small children and tell them to pick out whatever they want. Then the mother will walk over to the coffee counter to order her drink while leaving little Johnny and Suzy to pick out their treats. Little Johnny and Suzy will be eyeballing the cute little sprinkles doughnuts but if you ever so nicely point out the BIG KING SIZE TEXAS glazed doughnut to them, they will squeal with glee that they want that! Good luck mom! Yeah, sometimes I'm just evil that way. She should have been more specific about what they could choose.

The Hubs and I were off like a prom dress! We hit some good sales, chatted with some very nice people and admired some lovely homes on the beach. We ended up in Ilwaco which is a short distance south of Long Beach. This is a cute little place to explore as well. They have a great farmers market (not much produce) with lots of local crafters. Make sure you stop and look at the historical landmarks here. This part of the Washington and the Oregon Coast are some of the most beautiful scenery you will ever lay your eyes on, and it's filled with lots history. If you're a Lewis and Clark-era history buff, this is going to be the place for you.

RING RING...........Cell Phone .......Ring Ring................It's WSU Laura and Posse....They are in town! Let the games begin!

The first night WSU Laura and friends were in town we didn't get together because everyone was pretty tired from traveling and we had been going all day. I called WSU Laura and told her to take her posse to Clarks so they could enjoy the fantastic goodness it had to offer. So they stopped and stuffed themselves silly also. So everyone called it a night early. Well we did anyway. I do believe that WSU Laura's Posse played a little game of cards we love called "Cat and Mouse." I'll explain that later...

I have to mention a place that The Hubs and I found in Long Beach that we LOVED! It's called the Surfers Sand. It's a tiny little building off the road with a walk up window, some picnic tables and a big sign out front that says CHEESE STEAK SANDWICHES. It was fabulous! Worth the stop. You can read more about The Surfer Sands on my review on Yelp

Sunday................We did a whole lot of nothing for most of the day, just kind of hung out at our campsite, read, and walked the dog on the beach. Then we went and met WSU Laura and friends for lunch at The Light Ship which has a beautiful view of the beach. The food and service was great also.

Then we GIRLS (WSU Laura, Friend G, and Myself) decided we needed to venture out and take a ride down the coast to see if we could find this great antique store I had been to a couple of years ago. So off we went! We made some stops along the way at some yard sales, but finally we got down to Seaside Oregon where there it was...the antique store I had dreamed about for 2 years dying to go back to. There it was, that cute little building and an "OUT OF BUSINESS" sign! I wanted to cry. But I soon got over it when Friend G said let's get a Diet Coke and go in to Seaside to see if they have cute shops. Well we found a couple cute little shops but for the most part..........We don't need to go back to Seaside again! There is a little factory outlet mall that has some great shops, you might want to stop there to check it out....and in Oregon......TAX FREE!

Well now it's getting late and everyone's cell phone is ringing asking were we are and when are we coming back. So we head on back to Long Beach. We stop at Chico's Pizza and pick up dinner for all the guys. (always the best way to make sure men aren't mad at you when you walk in the door)

After the kids were fed and in bed we adults decided that a little game of "Cat and Mouse" was in order. This is a card game that has been in my family for years, and now I have passed it on to my friends. We love it. It's basically 3 card poker. Highest hand wins. You say mouse if you don't want to play after you get your cards, you say cat if you think your hand is a winner. If you're a cat and you lose to another cat, you have to match the money in the pot. The pot grows as the game goes on, the laughter gets bigger as more beverages are consumed. It's fun!

While we were playing cards we started giving each other nicknames. If you're in a posse don't you need a nickname? They always have a nickname on TV.

WSU Laura- "Hoodie", she's always wearing a hoodie.

Friend G - "G-Money" - She's got more wrapped up in beautiful handbags than I have in living room furniture!

WSU Laura's Hubs - "Bitch" - He was sitting closest to the wine, beer, fridge, and sink, He was everyone's bitch that night. Finally after too much wine Bitch finally spoke up and said "HEY, I'm not your bitch!"

Friend G's Hubs- "Music Man" - he's the technical, music guy and the best card dealer ever.

The Hubs - J-man..........not so creative but after about 4 bottles of wine the laughing gets to a new high and the creativity goes to an all time low.

Me...........I was on the end of the list so I didn't get a nickname.

Here are some pictures from our fun card game;

Good Wine, Good friends, make for a lot of laughter!First Trips of the evening! Congrats G-Money!"Hoodie" being all....Gangsta! Bitch got into the "Trips Club" too!
This was a great trip! We had so much fun. We are sooooooooooo looking forward to Pacific Beach in July where WSU Laura and Family, The Hubs and I, and some other friends are going to be spending a week at the beach.

CAN'T WAIT! On a side note........If he wasn't hanging his head out the truck window, this is how Charlie spent his 4 day vacation......Digging to China every chance he got! He was the happiest dog in the world!!!!!!

How Was The Beach?

FANFREAKINTABULOUS!!!!
Over the Memorial Day weekend The Hubs, Charlie and I headed over to the Washington Coast for 4 days. To Long Beach Washington. With mobile estate in tow we were off on Thursday afternoon as soon as The Hubs got home.

Getting started was a little rocky. Electric hitch blew a fuse in the middle of trying to get the trailer hooked up, The Hubs pissed off. I dropped a 12 pack of Diet Coke in the driveway where 3 can's exploded all over me, the dog was going crazy with excitement while I was holding on to his leash and cans of pop were spraying everywhere. What a mess! Hubs, still pissed off trying to get the hitch to work, no way in hell he's doing it manually. Finally we are on the road!

First stop.......end of our road.........The Hubs forgot to hook up the lights on the trailer. OOOPS!

Our route.........Hwy 405 to I-5 South. Then West on HWY 12, to HWY 107, then finally HWY 101 to the coast. Approximately 200 miles.

Second stop..........Montesano Quick Stop. Everyone needed to powder their nose! Just FYI there are NO rest stop between South Seattle and Montesano. There is one going north bound, but not south bound. Stop in Fife at McDonald's if you need powder your nose. While at the Quick Stop we asked where we should stop and have a bite to eat that we could get in and out with the mobile estate. The clerk said in the quickest response ever "Clarks, 8 miles up the road" This was also suggested by Andersen's RV Park in their e-mail to us for reservation updates.

So we were off to Clarks! Almost exactly 8 miles off the road was this little diner with NOTHING else around it for miles.
Clarks Restaurant

Let me tell you about Clarks...........I don't know why this place doesn't have a line of people waiting out front for hours! This was the best damn burger I have had in a long time! I'm not kidding and neither were some of the other patrons. When they got up to leave after stuffing themselves silly they walked over to the owner and said "This was the best burger I have had!" I wish I would have taken a picture of the burger and fries I had, but I ate it too fast, the camera wouldn't have captured it. The Hubs wouldn't have been any help anyway with the camera. I didn't hear a word out of him for about 15 minutes and I don't know if I heard him breath the whole time he was gobbling down his burger. The burgers are nummy nummy nummy, they have home made crisped to perfection fries. I promise you, your choice of items will be a 15 napkin entree that will drip down your arms with all it's goodness. Then after you thought you couldn't take any more deliciousness..............The shake came!

I had the hot fudge shake. FANTASTIC!! Let me tell you why this is going to be the BEST shake you ever had in your whole life...................It's made with HOMEMADE ICE CREAM! I swear to god! It's true! Annnnnnd you can taste it's home made goodness with everybite! You can read more about Clarks on my YELP review.

DO NOT PASS UP CLARKS

Next stop............RV Park, and getting set up at 10 pm. By now The Hubs is draggin butt. Not only has he been up since 4 am but his belly is full full full! He was ready to call it a night. I will say this, he did an EXCELLENT job backin that big ole mobile estate up in to the space in the pitch black night. I think he lost his Rookie RV Driving Card that night. I won't have to put the sign on the back of the mobile estate like I had planned...........It was going to say..............

NUCKINFUTS RV SCHOOL OF DRIVING

STUDENT DRIVER.

In Long Beach we stayed at Andersen's RV Park which was very nice. It's just a short walk away from the beach. This park is super dog friendly. Full hook ups, wi-fi, and cable. It was really nice and The Hubs and I would definitely stay again. It was very clean, staff was super helpful, facilities were very clean and maintained, and the park was actually quiet after 10 pm. My only complaint is that the spaces are super close together. There is NO Privacy at this park. We actually had to move our picnic table so the trailer next to us could put their slide out all the way out. You can also read my review of Andersen's on Yelp.

Friday Morning............I was up bright and early, ready to go and begging The Hubs to get up! Where would Princess Lazy Ass want to go so bright and early you ask?????? To 28 miles of garage sales! Yes that's right! I had The Hubs drag my high maintenance ass all the way over there so I could go to garage sales all weekend long! It was so fun. Well we also went to hang out with WSU LAURA and Company since I did invite myself along on their trip. There was that too. But the big main reason..........Garage Sales! I will tell you, this is a fun trip and if you DON'T have high expectations of finding lots of goodies you will enjoy it also. There are alot of garage sales yes, but they don't have tons of stuff at them. Most of the sales a spars with items. Every once in a while you will run across a sale that they have a garage full and drive way full of stuff. It was almost more fun driving around off the main hwy (were you stick to when in unfamiliar territory) looking at all the old beach homes and visiting with locals. There was one sale I spied them setting up on Friday at a local business in town. (Dr. Somethingorother, you know who you are) and I was so excited. They had this whole 4 bay shop full of stuff and they had been in there working on getting it set up all day long. I told the The Hubs tomorrow morning we go there first! That's going to be a good sale. Well it was RIDICULOUS! The prices at this place were so damn high they should have been embarrassed. They were even over 2nd hand store prices. I saw on Sunday that they still had a lot of stuff left. UUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHMMMMMMMM wonder why??? This sparks a huge rant the rest of the day.

Here is my rant on garage sales and my unsolicited opinion............It's your junk! Stuff you aren't using, stuff you need out of your way, just stuff you want gone! I know what it's worth new or what you paid for it new. I don't need to be told when I ask how much you want for it now. It's worth NOTHING if nobody buys it. If it's brand new in the box never been used........it's still not worth half of what you paid for it. If I want to pay half price, I'll wait for it to go on sale and go buy it for half price AND........get a receipt from the store so I can take it back if something goes wrong. Are you the garage sale seller going to give me that guarantee??? I didn't think so! Also, please don't charge me for your emotional attachment to an item. There was a little birdhouse I wanted and it didn't have a price on it. I asked how much it was and the woman said "oh a friend of mine from Texas gave that to me" "She was so excited to give that to me" "oh how about $7?" Me "oh OK, thank you" I put it down and left. It was a little birdhouse, I was willing to pay at the most $3 or $4 tops. Why didn't I haggle with her? She already told me she's still emotionally attached to the birdhouse. If your not ready to get rid of it then don't! I don't need you to justify to me why your getting rid of it, or pay a price that will help you justify you getting rid of it without any guilt! Garage sale sellers keep this in mind............those of us who go on a regular basis need NOTHING! We aren't desperate to have the item. We are out there garage selling looking for a deal on something we didn't even know we needed yet. We are there to have fun, shop around, and we like to get out and chat with people. If you want a higher price for your item maybe close to what you paid for it new......YOU need to take the time to sell it on EBay , Craigslist, or Consign it. Garage sales are meant to CLEAR OUT, not let me shop through your garage to see what you have. OK Done! Sorry about that needed to get that off my chest, we saw alot of these garage sales this weekend.

I did find a few garage sales that were fantastic! Those people were there to sell, clean out and make a little extra cash. Here are a few of my finds this weekend.

This was my very favorite find of the weekend. Black Pen and Ink of two Terrier Puppies. LOVE THIS!
My second most favorite find. This sweet little Bone China tea set. Love the little fuchsia pink star burst on it. I'm trying to figure out how this is going to look fabulous on my hutch.
These are a couple other beauties I found. The Chrome Canister set in Excellent condition and Pyrex Set in Excellent Condition. These will probably find their way to EBay or my Website for sale. They didn't work out for me like I thought they would.

Well this wraps up day 1 of the trip to Long Beach

TO BE CONTINUED

GEEEEEEE Honey I don't know????

Gee Honey I don't know why your side of the bed kind of smells like dog???

My little lover Charlie comes and gets in bed with me every morning as soon as The Hubs pulls out of the drive way. As soon as Charlie hears that garage door go down and the car pull out of the drive way he tears up the stairs and jumps up in bed. He snuggles down under the comforter and sleeps like a rock. There have been many a mornings that I have awaken to a cold nose and heaving dog breath snoring at the end of my nose.
This is where he sleeps until about 10:30 when he finally pulls his lazy dog self out of bed and comes barking and growling at me to take him out.
This little shit has it made! Trust me the cat isn't suffering either!

It All Went Crazy!

WOW! We came home from our trip to the beach on Monday and the landscape around our house went CRAZY!!! It's finally spring in the Pacific Northwest West Corner.

We came home to the front yard being full of Rhodie, Azaleas, Lilacs, and a bunch of other stuff all bloomed out. Nothing was showing when we left. We were wondering if the bushes were going to do anything this year.
The front door urn of flowers went crazy too. I have some big flower shooting up out of the middle of my planters. No clue as to what it is. The front of the house has my stump garden blooming. This would be all the Azaleas I trimmed back to stumps last year after finding them under two huge Juniper bushes we ripped out. I also pruned back (not text book regulations) and old lilac tree that did nothing last year. This year it's full of blooms.

We cut down two 80 ft fir trees last year because the house was turning green and nothing was growing.

WAHLA!! This year the Lilacs and Golden Chain on the property line have gone nuts. They are so beautiful.

This one of the many varieties of Lilacs that we have planted around our property. I have no idea what kind it is but it is GORGEOUS and smells wonderful.

We also have many different varieties of Peonies planted on the property. Again.............no idea what they are but damn they are lovely! This is the part of the property I love. Spring when all these variety of flowers start blooming.

Now let me back up a little ways so you don't think I'm a total idiot................The Hubs and I moved in to this house a little over 2 years ago in the fall. The previous owners owned a plant nursery and the yard was beautiful (the house very neglected inside and out) when we started looking at the house. Now mind you, it was in November so the 1 1/2 acre looked pretty manageable. Well let me tell you the first spring and summer we were here it was lovely and we enjoyed it until we soon found out ........We didn't know what the hell we were doing! We learned that we didn't know enough about gardening or did we have THAT much desire to learn about gardening for what it was going to take to manage this place in all it's glory.

I also think The Hubs had some funky fantasy he didnt' tell me about when we moved in that was about us wearing matching outfits in the garden and enjoying gardening together hand in hand! F*&%$ THAT!!! I hate working in the yard! I'm all about container gardening and mowing. After I had a major meltdown in the middle of weeding yet another flowerbed he finally gave up on the fantasy and quit inviting me to the local fancy nursery to buy me my very own pair of spiffy gardening boots.

So last year we started cutting down trees, ripping out flower beds, and using a lot of Round Up. This year the flowerbeds look worse then they ever have and I'm sure if the old owners drove by they would die when passing by. However, the landscape is finally getting to a manageable amount for us. The pictures you saw are just the front beds, there are 8 other huge different kinds of beds on this property that really look like crap that we haven't even gotten to yet. When I win the lotto...............I'm gettin a crew and levelin this bitch! Starting over!

I will be the first to admit that I hate working in the yard but love love love love the benefits that come from The Hubs doing it! Tonight I was able to cut a huge bouquet of Peonies that look LOVELY in my living room in their Milk Glass vase and a big smelly bouquet of Lilacs that are FABULOUS in their silver water pitcher in my sun room.

For those of you who wrote me wanting know about the beach weekend garage sales and why it wasn't blogged about yet.............I'm gettin to it! I keep getting side tracked with contests and flowers. I swear my next post will be all about it with pictures of my treasures.

WE HAVE WINNERS!!!

This has been tough ladies! All the entries were very good. I laughed and laughed. It was a hard decision ............DRUM ROLL PLEASE.........................

1. Mrs. Tootsie Farklepants - For being kind enough to loan out the use of her new home and throw a party that none of those guests will ever forget all while being pregnant. Good Job!

2. Lisa Rae - For not being able to show everyone her inner Madonna when the opportunity came yet still being able to think quickly while in the confines of a Gunne Sax Dress.

3. Tiffany - For being kind enough to help pay for another child's lovely birthday party. That was so nice of you.

Ladies contact me and collect your prizes. The order you won is the order in which you get to pick your prizes.

Because I loved all these stories, I have a little something for those who took the time to submit stories.
Please contact me
Laurie Ann
Baby Face
Shawn

This was fun and so very interesting. I had so much fun with this, that I'm going to have to host some other contests. If you have any suggestions for subjects let me know.
Thank you again ladies for your stories.

Last Day For Contest

It's the last day to submit your stories for the contest. Hurry get them in!
I will announce the winner tomorrow morning!

Off To The Beach

DON'T FORGET ABOUT THE CONTEST! Send me your stories of the worst paty or parties you have ever attended. Contest ends May 27th. I know you have stories!

The only time I seem to be able to get my lazy butt out of bed at 4 am with The Hubs are days we are leaving for a trip! Flying, RVing, Convertible road trip, I don't care, I'm up and ready!
I know, I know, no kids, no job, I should be getting up every morning with him. Making breakfast, ironing shirts, feeding the dog and cat, and just being there for him as I send him off on his hour long commute to the rat race. I don't! I'm a horrible wife, I really thought I would be better at it but it hasn't happened yet.
On the mornings we are leaving for a trip.............I'm the first on up!

My job this morning is to get the mobile estate all packed, dog ready, and make sure there are some pots and pans in cooking. We went on a trip last month and I forgot them. I never knew how creativity I could be in my cooking.

The Hubs has been putting in some long hours this week so he can leave early today , take tomorrow off and allow us to get on the raod this afternoon. Now leaving today was my idea, he's convinced we're crazy and sitting in rush hour traffic as we travel through 3 major cities isn't his idea of a good time. As well as he keeps reminding me that he gets up at 3:30 am to go to work and it's going to be a long day. He has reminded me of these things everyday for a week.

YEAH YEAH YEAH! Whatever.........LET'S GO!!!

So where are we going you ask???? Long Beach Washington Yep! The Hubs is drivin my high maintenance ass with the mobile estate to the beach!

Why Long Beach? Well WSU Laura and family will be there with their good friends the Woods Family. So we decided to invite ourselves and go over also. Aren't we great friends???? We just invite ourselves to where ever or what ever we think we will enjoy that you have planned. We will be staying at Andersen's RV Park and the other families will be staying at a resort so it's not like we invited ourselves to share their beach cottages.

Another big reason I wanted to go besides just getting to go to the beach, is that I heard Long Beach has a huge Community Garage Sale this weekend. This is what the website says........

World's Longest Garage Sale 28-miles of garage sales! Grab a copy of the Chinook Observer, or just follow the signs. There are so many sales, you can practically walk from one to the next, up and down the Peninsula.

This sounds right up my alley! WSU Laura said the last time they were there it wasn't that good but I need to see for myself. If we get there tonight then I'll be there all day to shop on Friday and Saturday. It's a garage selling dream for me.

So I have the mobile estate loaded with every thing we will need for the weekend. Laptop, wine, wine glasses, 1's and 5's (for the sale), my walking shoes, the dogs leash , clean underwear , toothbrush and the 30 gallon diesel gas tank filled with it's $4.95 a gallon gas. No wonder The Hubs bitches about going! I'm ready to go! As I sit here writting about the up coming trip I'm giddy with excitment. Like a kid on a half day of school. Still at age 43 I get so excited to go any where that I can hardly sleep the night before. It's one of those joys in life I hope never fades.

I'll keep you posted over the weekend on good finds, how the RV Park is and the goins ons. It's going to be fun!!!!!

Have a wonderful and safe holiday weekend no matter what you do.

What? Are you a FU*&%ING Hilbilly? Wear Sun Screen!

**NOTE** My original posting had the F-bomb written in the title instead of using %^$. The Hubs found this offensive and was sure that my mother and his mother would find it offensive too if they were to read it. He's right....Damn it! I admit it.......So I'm apologizing to those I offended including The Hubs and our mothers.

Over the last 3 days I have been suffering with a nasty sunburn that I got while working in the yard this last weekend. Yet another reason I hate yard work! Yard work doesn’t really promote a nice even tan and grass and dirt get stuck in the sun screen and grosses me out. I really do hate getting dirty.
While beating myself up over bad skin care choices YET AGAIN and whining like a baby because I can’t sleep at night with the burning on my shoulders and arms a story runs through my head over and over that should remind me to wear sunscreen but it doesn’t! Not until after I have burned myself does it come to mind. Now the rest of the summer I’ll be aware.

Let me set the stage before I get to the story…………I have NEVER EVER worn sun screen! As a teenage girl of the 70’s and 80’s I laid in the sun with my friends on foil blankets, with baby oil and Sun In on my hair. Then spent $100’s of dollars on tanning bed sessions. I was probably orange but damn I thought I looked good! I still feel much better when I have a little color. The other day I put on a pair of jean shorts and my white legs were so white they were almost as blue as the shorts. It’s tough here in Washington!

So on with the story........a few years ago a friend of mine and I decided to go over to the Gorge for a concert (an out door venue here in Washington. A beautiful must visit place or destination if you are ever planning a trip here). Well it was the middle of summer; we took off in my convertible with the top down, 2 single girls dressed for sunning and havin fun. 3 days in the sun I spent, with no sunscreen. I came back looking like someone had set me on fire. I was fire engine red. I even felt like someone had set me on fire but damn I didn’t care! It was going to tan up and I look fabulous!
Well I was at the gym walking on the treadmill the day after we got back from our fun little trip in the sun. My friend Kurt came up to me and said “What the hell is wrong with you?” “Are you a fucking hillbilly?” “Why wouldn’t you wear sunscreen?” “Your no spring chicken you know, sun at your age is even more damaging!” He then walked away leaving me there feeling like a total idiot. BUT…he was right! What was I thinking?????
So from then on I tried being aware that sunscreen would be my friend.

So with the holiday weekend coming up let me remind you …………..Don’t be a Fucking Hillbilly! Lather up yourself when you’re lathering up the kids and husband.
Hope this story sticks with you and makes you laugh when your lathering up on sunscreen.

HEY DON’T FORGET ABOUT THE CONTEST!!!
Only 5 more days left for entries. Get them in. If you’re not a blogger just e-mail them to me and I’ll post them.

It's A Contest! Worst Party You Have Ever Been To

We all love a good party. We admire those that throw fabulous parties and often aspire to be like them. I'm not a very good party planner/thrower and I will be the first to admit it. I do like to have them but I don't do it very often.
My good friend Polly Anna (not really her name) is a fantastic party planner. In fact, I have made her "Head Party Planner" of The Cool Chick Club. If the Cool Chick Club members ever need to have a national convention we are so hiring her to plan it! I have never been to a bad party hosted by Polly Anna. She always has great themes, includes everyone and makes you feel welcome...even if you did crash it with your kids and animals. It's always stress free to go to her parties...all you have to do is show up to have a good time. AND....................she always sends you home with some little gift for attending. LOVE THAT! I think that's why I never miss a party she's having. Invited or not...In my mind, even a bad party should be like this because............. WE ARE OVER 40! We don't have to have keggers anymore and even if we do, they should still be done with a little class and etiquette.
Just my opinion.

So this morning, Polly Anna and I are chatting, and she starts telling me about a party she has been invited to. In true gossip fashion, we start picking apart why IT'S ALL WRONG!! And, how it's doomed from the beginning with the number of Emily Post violations just in the invitation. This got us on the subject of parties that we have attended that have not been thoroughly thought out, seen as rude to others, made you say "what the hell?" or flat out tacky. So I started telling her my stories of the two tackiest and weirdest parties that I have ever been to.

The first one was a wedding reception that I attended in the late 80's. It was held on the parking pad between two duplex apartments. Urban Cowboy was the theme, and there were two big ole gals, with big ole hair, with big ole earrings, big ole cowboy hats and Virgina slim cigarettes hanging out of their mouths... servin up cake. Did I mention the ladies had big ole long painted acrylic nails that were huge! (I refer to them as chicken claws..) They were smoking, slicing cake, chatting about how tacky this reception was, and pushing the cake off of the knife, on to the plates with their chicken claws. Then.........SUCKING (no, I'm not kiddin') the frosting out of their nails and going to serve the next piece of cake. It was at that point I decided I needed to say "Congrats" to the couple and be on my way.

Bad party #2........A small wedding that was both, the bride and groom's second marriage. A nice little outdoor wedding in the yard of a community hall. The neighbor kids' dog had got loose and ran through the wedding ceremony with kids in tow screaming Scooter's name trying to catch him. A small interruption, but they got married anyway. Then it was off to the reception where immediately, everyone started going to their cars for coolers and crockpots. I asked another friend fetching her cooler what was up. She said the bride had called everyone last night and asked them to bring a dish so they didn't have to pay a caterer. Uhmmmm I didn't get that call! So there I was.... Empty handed again. Entering the reception I thought to myself......."right about now, a nice stiff drink would be in order." To my surprise, my choices were water from the tap in the kitchen (nice wedding cups sitting next to the sink) or beer out of the keg. "I'll have a beer!" I say to myself.......oh wait........I FORGOT MY MONEY FOR THE KEG DONATION! Yup, there it was...a basket with a handwritten note asking for donations. WTF??? Again, I had to say my congrats to the bride and groom and exit hastily. I would like to say on a happy note.......They split up and divorced 2 months later.

I also attended a wedding where the official of the wedding was drunk and couldn't remember the bride or grooms name during the ceremony. Not a pretty scene after the ceremony.

So later on today I was having lunch with some long time girlfriends and I brought up this subject of bad parties. Well they all jumped in telling their stories. A favorite.............the friend who always invites everyone over for a BBQ but wants them to bring their own wine and meat. Like Hip Girl said..........."If I have to take everything there why the hell don't I just stay home and have her over to my house?" Well said.

So this has prompted me to have a contest. This contest will run May 17th -27th
Please send me your stories of the worst or tackiest party get together whatever, you have ever been too. Not one that was meant to be horrible (Ugly Christmas Sweater Party), one that just ended up that way. Funny, sad, why you hate your mother-in-law... I don't care. Let's hear em! All stories will be judged by myself and Polly Anna... and we will be using Emily Post as our guide. The more violations the better.

You can e-mail your stories to me and I will post them on my blog, or you can post them in the comments area. The top two will be awarded prizes. It will be a fantastic prize too! Nothing Tacky! You already had to endure the horrible party, you should finally be compensated for the huge waste of time you will never get back. Prize pictures soon to be posted. Git to Writin'!!!
Drum Roll......
The prizes are....

Your choice of Lolita glass.
Glamour Girl Martini
Leopard Print Wine
Mommy's Pacifier









Mommy's Pacifier...This is very cute

P.S Ladies, I'm putting together for more of these. If there is a special one you would like I'll be happy to order it for you. They make great gifts!
Let me know and I can quote you some prices.

Here are some of the stories sent to me by e-mail

This story was sent in by Lisa Rae. Ooooooooh it's good! Yet another case of .........bad circumstances make bad parties.

Well here it is. This is probably my worst party experience mostly because, we don't get invited to many parties, (we're lots of fun, we just have no friends) not because I have been to so many and this is the worst of the worst...but it ain't good.

It was back when I was a very sophisticated 19 year old. My girlfriend who had lived across the street from me when we were kids was getting married to the father of her baby. This was his 2nd, it was a great start. I was the lucky Maid of Honor. Mostly, I think I was her only friend she could rely on to show up sober.

She had no money, no family and was marrying an idiot and to tell you the truth, much as I loved her, I didn't want to be there.

First there was the dress she wanted me to wear. Now mind you it was the 80's, but being a MOH in a Gunny Sax dress wasn't my idea of cool, when I knew I could dress more like Madonna (I had so much great underwear and cross necklaces) and bring some true class to this wedding. Much as I tried to talk her out of it, I was wearing the calico Gunny Sax, and hating every minute of it.

So my boyfriend and I get to the church and I help her get dressed as we are waiting for the rest of the wedding party. ie: the drunken groom and best man. Well she has this beautiful white dress that buttons all down the back, that she got a great price on, and I'm thinking-"Wow something is how it should be here". Until I start buttoning her in, and realize there are way more loops than buttons. Great sale this must have been..I try and tuck in the extra loops the best I can when I look down and see that she hasn't changed her shoes. "Hey" I say, "You'd better go get your shoes on" I get a blank stare. I realize I stuck my foot in my mouth. Except my feet aren't wearing black pumps with a white wedding gown like hers are. Oh well, maybe no one will be looking at her feet. Especially since she will be trying to hold up her Rum and Coked up groom!

All ready to go down the aisle now-oops-where are the groom and best man? Frantically looking out the sacred church window (swearing) we wait...Oh-here they come-lets go-but wait-the black pump is stuck in the heat vent on the floor. Now I'm thinking, barefoot is better anyway, but she doesn't agree. Finally we rip her shoe from the vent. Damaged heel aside everything is okay.

In walks Groom and Best-Man. (By the way-they are a 1/2 hour late-there was drinkin' to be done!) Okay-let's get this overwith-but oops! Where is the ring? Best Man supposed to have ring-Best Man lost ring-Best Man sacrifices his own ring to put on brides finger, (I swear it was a skull and cross bones), can ya feel the love? So off we all go, most of the party stumbling down the aisle. The wedding was wonderful, the minister kept having to ask their names, the groom could hardly stand, the skull and crossbones fell off her finger, and I kept trying to be Madonna while feeling like Lily Tomlin.

Whew! Wedding over-on to the reception. I can't wait to get into my jeans and celebrate this sacred event! So we drive to the reception hall...oh..I mean TRAILER PARK! Yes, it was great. (I think I heard banjos playin). We pull up to the central trailer where all the Pall Mall smokin family members of the groom are gettin out the fixins, get out of the car and I hear the groom yelling "Party-Where's the KEG?!!!" By now he is in his plaid shirt and Levi's (Sorry Mr. Strauss) and I think she is in the Gunny Sax I took off. Who knows, they all really looked alike.

Well now she starts crying because he's drunk, she doesn't have a ring and - oh yeah- she MARRIED HIM! I'd be crying too. That was it for me-even the free beer didn't make me wanna stay.

6 years later when I got married, I invited her to my wedding. She called and told me she just couldn't come because she was getting a divorce and it was to hard to go to a wedding now. 6 years and 4 more kids later!!!! I wasn't shocked that she was getting a divorce-I was shocked she had slept with him 4 more times!

Story From Shawn in Seattle.........
The year was 1986- a summer of partying after graduating from highschool. A friend was dating a slightly older guy who shared a house with a friend and we headed to an evening party expecting the usual mix of young people drinking and flirting, enjoying a warm summer night.
But someone brought a recently paroled convict who was renting a room from his mom... the guy squirted lotion in the palm of his hand and walked around showing everyone how much it looked like semen and kept simulating jacking off. We were all getting increasingly creeped out and avoiding him when someone made the mistake of suggesting he was over compensating for insecurities about his penis size. I was sitting down when he appeared next to me and dropped his pants, angrily announcing to the world that he was perfectly well endowed. Nothing like a felon's ball sac in your 18-year-old face to make you want to head home.
Not the best story but one that has always stayed in my head.
Unfortunately.

HAPPY DAY !! HAPPY DAY!!!

Happy Day ! Happy Day ! Happy Day!

Today I went out in the pouring down rain to get the mail and take the dog out for a little pee. Anticipating junk mail and bills I didn't run up the driveway as I would have if I were expecting something.

I opened the mailbox and what did I find???? Not only my Martha Stewart Magazine but..............My invite to Annie's Antiques Sale this weekend.

If you haven't made a trek to Snohomish before, this weekend is the time to do it! So gather up your girlfriends, your daughters, Granny, the dog, your husband or someone who just looks like they want to go for a ride and head to Snohomish.

There so many great little shops in Snohomish but I love Annie's Antiques the most. There is nothing I enjoy more then a beautiful day, a ladies lunch at the Snohomish Pie Company and a visit to Annie's where I always find something. The reason I always go to Annie's first is because out of all the swanky antique stores in Snohomish (and the Seattle Burbs) she is ALWAYS the most reasonably priced and doesn't have the same old tired stuff. She's not running a museum, she's there to sale stuff so there is always something new.

Sale starts Friday May 16th and runs thru Sunday May 18th. Items will be marked down 10%-50%. With already reasonable prices.......This is a fantastic sale!

Store on Second Street, Snohomish Washington

2000 sqf. of Fabulous Stuff

Now here the even more exciting part.............The sale is at both stores!

Yes it's true! Annie has 2 stores now (for those of you who haven't been to Snohomish for a while) that are full of great items. French and Italian furniture and accessories from the past, mixed with new decor. I guarantee you will leave with something.

The new store is on First Street down at the west end of town. Across the street from Chuck's Seafood Grotto and the American Legion. Look for the monogrammed estate flag out front.

Here are some more places you can hit if your planning a day trip.

Snohomish

Snohomish Bakery

Joy Works

Queen Bee

Antique Rose Farm and Antiques

Flower World.....Flowers Flowers Flowers!


Woodinville
Molbak's...........Flowers flowers flowers and wonderful things. They also serve lunch here.
Ste. Michele Winery..........Fantastic wine, great gift shop, other wineries near by.
Purple Cafe ......Try the flights and Lobster Mac&Cheese

Redhook Brewery...............Fantastic Deck for outside seating.

That should keep you busy for the beautiful weekend we have forcasted. Get the sunscreen, put on your shorts and flip flops and take a road trip!

Please e-mail me if you need more information on where to go or some place I missed. I'm always up for a good road trip.

THANK YOU Shabee Chick Designs

THANK YOU AMBER at Shabee Chick Designs. I love the new blog and I love the new website. Check out all her hard work at Cool Chick Club. I still haven't been able to get all my items listed on the website but it's coming along. Keep watching for items and links to make you the Coolest Chick in your neighborhood! I'm excited, it's going to be fun.

WOW! It's been a busy week. I am the queen of Fakebusy and this week was no exception. You ask what Fakebusy is? It's when your busy running around doing things that are unimportant but make you look like your the busiest person ever. Example........spending all day driving around to different craft stores looking for the perfect Sonora Palm. You also have to work in a couple errands so you have somethings that makes it look like you were productive. That is Fakebusy. It's not easy, it's an art and I have it perfected!
So this last weeks Fakebusy and why I have been waaaaaaaaaaaay to busy to blog.

Working with Shabee Chick Designs getting my blog and website designed. LOVE IT! Poor Amber, she had no idea what she was getting herself in to when agreeing to work with me. There is a reason I don't do well at computers or sewing! I can't follow directions.

Another thing at the top of the list this week was making arrangements to attend The Farm Chick Antique Sale in Spokane Washington. Yes you heard it here first! WSU Laura and I are so excited we can't stand it! Delightful Donna will be going along and my good friend Michele Libbey. She's a Bow girl. It's going to be a girls road trip weekend full of shopping, gossiping, and eating! Exactly what Cool Chick Club is all about. Drive, shop, lunch, cocktails, and shop some more!
We don't have too many flea markets in our area (weather never cooperates) so whenever there is one it's an event. This is an event we can't miss especially since it's kind of in our own backyard.

On Friday I was lucky enough to be invited to a great event in Mount Vernon. My long time friend from grade school and high school (know as the Bow Girls) Becky Wells invited me and of course I had to call the other Bow girls to join us. Being Becky's birthday and all I couldn't let it slide. Suzy Benson Janicki came along and Lori Wilhonen Walser met up with us for lunch. A couple of the others couldn't make it. Of course I had to bring Delightful Donna as well. She loves this stuff! I also called my mother too. It was just a great little posse! The event was Juntune Farm Antique Show and Garden Show which is a charity event for the Children's Hospital . This was the 9th annual and I'm embarrassed to say I have never attended this. IT WAS FABULOUS!!! This will be a definite mark on my calendar for the next one. There were so many great antique vendors and artist there. The gardens were beautiful despite the cold weather we have been having that has delayed spring in these parts. The Hospital guild that put this on did a wonderful job. I'm sorry I don't know specifically what guild it was but GOOD JOB LADIES!
During one of our walks through the gardens I asked my mother 3 or 4 times what she wanted to do for Mother's Day and she said "nothing, your Dad is gone this weekend and I'm doing nothing" " I said "OK, but remember that when your sitting at home on Sunday ticked off that your kids did nothing for you!"
I didn't say I was running for daughter of the year.

After all the fabulous shopping, and garden admiring it was off to Skagit Valley Gardens to look at flowers, garden art and best of all have some LUNCH! Now again being from Skagit Valley and raised most of my life there, I was embarrassed that not only didn't I know about this place but I hadn't been there. I also didn't know there is a wonderful little cafe in the middle of the nursery. The food was wonderful. It's owned by Ray and Katie and they do a great job. The flowers were all so beautiful. I could have spent a bunch of money but since The Hubs and I agreed no flower buying until we get some of our existing flower beds weeded I held off. It was a great day and the company was wonderful. I usually go home with a belly ache from laughing so hard. There is nothing like those friendships that have been there most of your life.
Even my mom told me later that evening........"I just love those girls, they make me laugh" "they made me laugh when you were kids and they make me laugh now"

The Hubs and I had a very lazy day on Saturday. We spent a lot of time talking about what we should be doing. What we would do if we won the power ball lotto of 120 million and what we should do for lunch. Then about noon we decided that maybe I should look for a Mother's Day gift my mom. Even if she said she wanted nothing I knew she's lying!
First stop Annie's Antiques in Snohomish. Didn't find any thing for my mother but I did spot a few things I'm going to need myself when her big sale starts next week. 10%- 50% off the entire store.........actually it's both stores. She has 2 great stores now.
Then it was off to Molbaks where again there were just too many lovely things to choose from, so mom didn't get a thing from there either. If you have never visited Molbaks put it on your list. They have some of the best ideas as well as just lovely things. They also have .........Wonderful Lunch! I wasn't kidding when I said this Cool Chick likes lunch! That was about the extent of our Saturday. We got nothing done and just continued the theme through Sunday.

Sunday morning I called my mother to see if she still wanted to do nothing for Mother's Day. I knew what she really wanted to do but I just wasn't' ready to go there. Finally after about a half hour on the phone I said "do you want me to buy you .99 lunch at the casino?" Of course she said "I can be ready to go in 5 minutes, I'm showered and dressed!"
So that is how I spent my Mothers Day with my mother, at the Angel of the Winds Casino watching her win and watching me loose. When it was all said and done...................mom had to buy her own .99 lunch because I couldn't afford to!
The casino was packed and my mom said to me " I haven't seen one person here I know!" "I guess all the good mommies are home" "I'm a bad mommy" I said " well I haven't seen one kid here I know with any of these mothers, so I guess that makes me a bad kid too" "All the good kids are home cooking dinner for their good mommys, giving them fabulous gifts and cards." " I'm hear crying because I'm broke, and your buying your own .99 lunch!"
I guess neither of us will get an award this year.

It has been a great week and weekend. Now I'm ready to get caught up on my blog reading, answering, and maybe even tackle that website and get it conquered.

Hope you all had a wonderful Mothers Day!

A Full Weekend Of Crime Fighting and Shopping

What a weekend! I should be exhausted. This weekend was the beginning of garage sale season in our area. I love this time of year. It's the time of year that there are so many garage sales that it's hard to know where to start. So I was up early, dressed, tote bag ready, Diet Coke ready and armed with the garage sale list and a Thomas Guide. Delightful Donna and I were off! We were as excited as kids on their first trip to Disneyland! Well, we went to 5 or 6 garage sales and it was a bust. We really didn't' find any thing that great. We did however find a great new Antique store in Downtown Everett and a bakery called PAVE. The Spare Room Antiques in the old Jack's Men's Store is fabulous! The bakery.......it was OK.

So after a busy morning of shopping and then lunch we were on our way out of downtown Everett when we drove by the Village Theater where I saw a young man (14-15) and he appeared to be drawing on the wall with a big black pen. As we drove by I said to Donna, "Is that little S*&^# writing on the wall?" She said" I think he was!" So I pulled over and dialed 911. I was so annoyed that this little disrespectful brat was tagging a wall and in broad day light. I couldn't let it go. This on the heels of seeing protesters on the news deface our state capital building in the name of "protest" . I was truly outraged. As I got on the phone with 911 and told them what I had seen they asked me to stay at the scene so I did. I tell ya, it took Everett Police Department all but 1 minute to get someone there. They had that hoodlum handcuffed and up against the wall before I could even say "Holly S*&&%!" Then the officer asked me if this was the kid I saw, what did I see him drawing and what color was the pen. I ID the kid and filled out a report. As I was sitting there filling out the report the police officer was really giving this kid the 3rd degree on what he was doing. All the sudden the kid started crying. I said to Donna "If I had done that when I was his age I would have been begging the officer to not call my parents and just take me to prison!" Donna said"me too!" I knew that prison would have been better then either of my parents coming to get me. Well this whole thing went on for about a half hour. They took the kid to lock up (I think that per his mothers request) and we were on our way to do a little more shopping! Another crime interrupted by the dynamic duo.

As we were wondering through one of our favorite thrift stores we decided that we were just tired and ready to go home. It had been a full day of crime fighting and shopping. When I got home The Hubs said "what are you going to do for dinner tonight" I looked at him like he had a 3rd eye growing out of his forehead and said "I'm tired!" "Do you realize I have been shopping and fighting crime all day?"

We went to town to eat! :-)